Avoiding Confrontation is Hazardous to Your Health

A study conducted by Leadership IQ revealed that in the last three months, 93% of people surveyed have avoided confronting a coworker and 81% of managers have avoided confronting a subordinate about inappropriate behavior. The study also showed that 89% of people have avoided confronting their boss when he or she failed to fulfill an expectation or promise. In each of these instances, confrontation was avoided even when a customer or the organization suffered as a result.

Why do we avoid confrontation? Because, as the study showed, 77% of people say that when they speak up about sensitive topics, the other party gets angry or defensive and 83% of people say that they occasionally or frequently withhold important information from bosses, coworkers and employees because they fear the conversation will end badly. Not only are employees hesitant to talk to their bosses, those same bosses are avoiding confrontations with their employees.

Most people do not feel comfortable speaking the truth about sensitive topics, said Mark Murphy, CEO of Leadership IQ. But when employees and leaders lack the confidence or training to have these tough conversations, the company and its customers will suffer. In fact, according to one analysis, 37% of an employees willingness to stay at their company is driven by their comfort with speaking the truth about these sensitive issues. Few people want to address sensitive behavioral issues, even though being free to do so has such a huge impact on retention, customer service, and the overall culture of an organization. And if it has that much of an influence on whether or not an employee stays with a particular company, it has to also impact their productivity and effectiveness while theyre there.

The same hesitancy to deal with uncomfortable issues at work takes place in our personal lives, too. And for the same reasons we dont want to deal with the consequences. We dont want to be on the receiving end of someone elses anger, defensiveness, hostility, or hurt feelings. So we might handle it a couple of different ways. We ignore the issues, stuffing them down inside ourselves where they fester until finally a last straw triggers an ugly explosion on the unsuspecting other person. Or we quietly reach a breaking point, call it quits and leave the other person mystified as to what were so upset about. A lot of times, we may even be assuming the other person knows what theyre doing to upset us when they dont. Or were assuming theyre upset with us when they arent.

Confrontation isnt especially easy or comfortable but it is manageable without it being a knock-down, yelling, name-calling, dish-throwing fight. Jane, a coaching client, didnt think she could be open and honest with anyone if she thought it would hurt their feelings or make them angry. She was afraid of the other persons response and that she wouldnt know how to handle it. She finally got fed up with being a doormat at the sacrifice of her self-esteem. She realized that she wasnt responsible for the other persons reaction to her honestly expressing her own opinion. If they were hurt or angry, that was something theyd have to work out. If they disagreed, that was okay, even if they ended up agreeing to disagree. At first it was a painful struggle to force herself to be open and honest sometimes, she said, it still is. But, like anything else, the more she does it, the more comfortable she gets with it. In the process, she feels a whole lot better about herself, too.

Sondra Whitt is a founding partner of Purpose Unlimited, whose purpose is to transform lives, leaders and organizations through the power of purpose. She has a masters degree in Industrial/Organizational Psychology and consults, coaches, writes and speaks on personal and organizational development. She specializes in problems in the workplace, communication, team-building, selection, and finding and living your purpose in life.

Florida Auto Insurance Quotes
Worker Compensation Insurance
Hair Dye And Baldness
Prom Updos And Hairstyles
Hair Laser Male Removal
Anti Loss Hair Shampoo
Affordable Student Health Insurance
Bad Credit Loans Online For Automobiles
No Credit Good Credit Bad Credit Loans For Motorcycles In
Chicago Baldness Treatment
Delta Dental Insurance
Australian Loans For People With Bad Credit
Best Loans For Bad Credit Investment Online
Baldness Information
Laser Treatment Certification Le Hair Removal
African Lion Safari In Ohio
Baldness Male Pattern Treatment
Best Term Life Insurance Quote
Private Education Loans For Bad Credit Consumers
Student Loan For College College Student Loan Consolidation
Health Insurance Quote Illinois
Chicago Baldness Remedy
Russian Barbers Cure For Baldness
Michigan Health Insurance Plan
Psychology Of Baldness
Bald Baldness Bald Howtostophairloss
Buy Insurance Agency
Health Insurance Reference
Baldness Australia
Credit Card Payment
Guaranteed Payday Loans For People With Bad Credit
College Loans For People With Bad Credit
Instant Insurance Quote
Discount+car+insurance+company
College+student+loan+consolidation+id
Solutions Ideas Creative Business Financing
Lifewise Health Insurance
Stanford University Medical Center Head Lice
Tulsa College Loan Consolidation
Feline Baldness
Car Insurance Comparison Uk
Female Pattern Baldness Proven Cure
Work From Home Internet Business Opportunity Work From Home Internet Business Opportunity Insane Income Successforfreedom
Male Pattern Baldness
Dental Insurance Rates
Haircare
Home Appliance Insurance
Personnel Loans For People With Bad Credit
Baldness Hair Loss Baldness Baldness Howtostophairloss
Baldness Chicago Treatment
Inherited Male Baldness
Head Lice In Children
Credit Life Insurance
Morgage Loans For Bad Credit
Male Pattern Baldness Cure
Baldness Hair Loss Product Baldness Howtostophairloss
Hair Loss Treatments Hair Loss Information Hair Loss
Cash+in+insurance+life+policy
Car Insurance Quote In Canada
Baldness Research And Information
Baldness Puerto Rico
Commercial Loans For Bad Credit
Home Loans For Extremely Bad Credit
Vacation Planner
Life Insurance Policy Buyer
Graphics Of Hairstyling Tools
Low Interest Loans For People With Bad Credit
Alternative Education Loans For Bad Credit
Loans For Tenats With Bad Credit Nocredit Checks
College Loan Debt Consolidation College Loan Repay
Loans For People With Bad Credit Rating
Child Health Insurance Program Chip
Tallahassee Health Insurance
Home Loans For Bad Credit
Baldness Solutions